Way back in high school when I played basketball, I used to foul out quite a bit. Coach Howard used to joke with me about my aggressive and impulsive play. He nicknamed me freight train because of the way I played, all over the place. He told me time and time again that I should blow my whistle. I guess I did come on like a freight train in practice and during the games, all the time really. I was very aggressive. I played hard all the time without a thought or a strategy; I was all over the place. I was the coach’s player when he wanted someone to foul. I was the defender when he needed a player frazzled. I wasn’t afraid of anybody, no matter the size or ability of the player. I would go after anybody. No question, I was a full on freight train.
Life, well, yeah, I can kind of be that person in life, too.Yeah, I can come across like a freight train. I sometimes don’t blow my whistle. I speak what’s on my mind without a filter, and I act quickly in a moment. Like a freight train, I can enter a room or a conversation. I am a passionate person, and well, sometimes once I get started I am not even aware of what I’m doing. I’ve never meant to monopolize the moments, though it sometimes happens. I suppose many times I have been the freight train of the conversations and of life without even realizing it.
Lately, though, I’ve become more aware of this full on person, and I’ve slowed down a bit to try and find more of that other side of me. I listen a bit more. I stop myself when I realize that I am talking too much. Sometimes I even stop myself mid-sentence when I realize I am just going nowhere, and I find a way to engage the other person or people.
Tonight my friend Sedona responded to yesterday’s blog writing about how being aware will help me slow down my Maya train when I want to or need to. Awareness is helping me channel my passion, slow down the moments, and take in things. I’ve always admired the people who take it all in before speaking. While I will never be that person, I have begun to see how I can help that person find his/her voice, how I can engage that person, and how I can slow down the moments.
Maybe I don’t need to blow my whistle. Maybe I just need to put the brakes on the train every now and then. Yes, I can slow down the Maya train.